The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.

Quote by George Burns

Topics: George Burns Quotes

Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you've got...

The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you've got...

You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.

You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.

I can't afford to die; I'd lose too much money.

I can't afford to die; I'd lose too much money.

I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased...

I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased...

Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.

Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I...

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I...

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman -...

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman -...

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die...

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die...

You've got to be honest; if you can fake that, you've got it made.

You've got to be honest; if you can fake that, you've got it made.

Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything...

Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything...

How can I die? I'm booked.

How can I die? I'm booked.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only...

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only...

You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what...

You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what...

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

In this Age, when it is said of a man, He knows how to live,...

In this Age, when it is said of a man, He knows how to live,...

At middle age the soul should be opening up like a rose, not closing up...

At middle age the soul should be opening up like a rose, not closing up...

The rest of all the acts of Asa, and all his might, and all that...

The rest of all the acts of Asa, and all his might, and all that...

O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet.

O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet.