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Related Quotes

I went to a football game once and got punched in the face, but you...

I went to a football game once and got punched in the face, but you...

All men are created Equal. Some just have more Splenda.

All men are created Equal. Some just have more Splenda.

When I saw you, I saw love. When I saw you naked, I saw lust....

When I saw you, I saw love. When I saw you naked, I saw lust....

I want to be happy and sad at the same time. Yeah, I know it...

I want to be happy and sad at the same time. Yeah, I know it...

The morning always has a way of creeping up on me and peeking in my...

The morning always has a way of creeping up on me and peeking in my...

If you work in a hospital, you cant easily fake call in sick to work....

If you work in a hospital, you cant easily fake call in sick to work....

I want to mail my mailman something. He always brings me mail, yet I never...

I want to mail my mailman something. He always brings me mail, yet I never...

The other day I went to the Huddle House. I wasnt hungry, I just wanted...

The other day I went to the Huddle House. I wasnt hungry, I just wanted...

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull...

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull...

A hotel is a temporary aquarium for people. Thats why I travel with a fishing...

A hotel is a temporary aquarium for people. Thats why I travel with a fishing...

If I told you Ive worked hard to get where Im at, Id be lying,...

If I told you Ive worked hard to get where Im at, Id be lying,...

I may not be a horse whisperer, but I certainly can and do shout at...

I may not be a horse whisperer, but I certainly can and do shout at...

From the ages of 8-18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we...

From the ages of 8-18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we...

If I can delay your action with my inaction, then Ill gladly do nothing for...

If I can delay your action with my inaction, then Ill gladly do nothing for...

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn't around...

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn't around...

Dont go looking for pancakes when you have flapjacks at home.

Dont go looking for pancakes when you have flapjacks at home.

I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In...

I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In...

Cynicism is the only form in which base souls approach honesty.

Cynicism is the only form in which base souls approach honesty.

Cynicism is the humour of hatred.

Cynicism is the humour of hatred.

If there was anything that depressed him more than his own cynicism, it was that...

If there was anything that depressed him more than his own cynicism, it was that...

Me and Matt love to argue, but in general our sense of humor is pretty...

Me and Matt love to argue, but in general our sense of humor is pretty...

I think like any marriage, especially when you've had divorced parents like myself; you want...

I think like any marriage, especially when you've had divorced parents like myself; you want...

Your only obligation in any lifetime is to be true to yourself.

Your only obligation in any lifetime is to be true to yourself.