The first thing which I can record concerning myself is, that I was born. These are wonderful words. This life, to which neither time nor eternity can bring diminution - this everlasting living soul, began. My mind loses itself in…
Quote by Groucho Marx
No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early.
I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the...
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it, and then misapplying...
Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does.
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've...
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I...
Before I speak, I have something important to say.
Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others.
Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does.
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
I won't belong to any organization that would have me as a member.
I have nothing but confidence in you, and very little of that
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.
Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.