See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.

Quote by Robin Williams

Topics: Robin Williams Quotes

You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.

You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.

God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply...

God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply...

Freud: If its not one thing, its your mother.

Freud: If its not one thing, its your mother.

I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic...

I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic...

We have a president for whom English is a second language. He's like 'We have...

We have a president for whom English is a second language. He's like 'We have...

Men wearing pants so tight that you can tell what religion they are.

Men wearing pants so tight that you can tell what religion they are.

If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.

If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.

Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals...

Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals...

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White...

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White...

Spring is nature's way of saying, Let's party!

Spring is nature's way of saying, Let's party!

When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family...

When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family...

Ah, yes, divorce... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through...

Ah, yes, divorce... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through...

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?

Ah, yes, Divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a mans genitals through...

Ah, yes, Divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a mans genitals through...

When in doubt, go for the dick joke.

When in doubt, go for the dick joke.

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only...

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only...

Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money.

Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money.

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.

We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.

We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.

Comedy is acting out optimism.

Comedy is acting out optimism.