We have a president for whom English is a second language. He's like 'We have to get rid of dictators,' but he's pretty much one himself.

Quote by Robin Williams

Topics: Dictators Quotes

The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, 'Give me your poor, your tired, your...

The Statue of Liberty is no longer saying, 'Give me your poor, your tired, your...

Freud: If its not one thing, its your mother.

Freud: If its not one thing, its your mother.

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?

We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.

We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.

You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.

When in doubt, go for the dick joke.

When in doubt, go for the dick joke.

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only...

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only...

You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.

You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.

Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.

Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.

You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.

You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.

When the media ask George W. Bush a question, he answers, 'Can I use a...

When the media ask George W. Bush a question, he answers, 'Can I use a...

If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.

If women ran the world we wouldn't have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.

I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic...

I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic...

Cricket is basically baseball on valium.

Cricket is basically baseball on valium.

No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world.

No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world.

Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money.

Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money.

The Second Amendment says we have the right to bear arms, not to bear artillery.

The Second Amendment says we have the right to bear arms, not to bear artillery.

I like my wine like my women - ready to pass out.

I like my wine like my women - ready to pass out.

If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number?

If it's the Psychic Network why do they need a phone number?

Comedy is acting out optimism.

Comedy is acting out optimism.