Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Quote by Woody Allen

Topics: Life Quotes

I've often said, the only thing standing between me and greatness is me

I've often said, the only thing standing between me and greatness is me

I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.

I've never been an intellectual but I have this look.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

Harvard makes mistakes too, you know. Kissinger taught there.

Harvard makes mistakes too, you know. Kissinger taught there.

Although we've come to the end of the road, still I can't let you go,...

Although we've come to the end of the road, still I can't let you go,...

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that...

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that...

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.

Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government.

I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government.

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much...

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much...

Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.

Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.

Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more...

Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more...

To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one...

To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one...

Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will...

Another good thing about being poor is that when you are seventy your children will...

If you want to make God laugh, tell him your future plans.

If you want to make God laugh, tell him your future plans.

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...

I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or...

I think a relationship is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or...

A man in a relationship trades intimacy to get sex. A woman in a relationship...

A man in a relationship trades intimacy to get sex. A woman in a relationship...

The more connections you and your lover make, not just between your bodies, but between...

The more connections you and your lover make, not just between your bodies, but between...