If you tell the truth about how youre feeling, it becomes funny.

Quote by Larry David

Topics: Funny Quotes, People Quotes

I've led this empty life for over forty years and now I can pass that...

I've led this empty life for over forty years and now I can pass that...

If you tell the truth about how you're feeling, it becomes funny.

If you tell the truth about how you're feeling, it becomes funny.

Most of the time I'm thinking, I'm glad that scene was improvised.

Most of the time I'm thinking, I'm glad that scene was improvised.

I had a job as a paralegal. I drove a cab.

I had a job as a paralegal. I drove a cab.

Millions of people are married. I've never picked up a paper and seen a headline...

Millions of people are married. I've never picked up a paper and seen a headline...

It has to do - I think - with growing up in an apartment, with...

It has to do - I think - with growing up in an apartment, with...

I guess I still feel that I'm a comedian; if I had to pick one...

I guess I still feel that I'm a comedian; if I had to pick one...

Sure, being a reservist wasn't as glamorous, but I was the one who had to...

Sure, being a reservist wasn't as glamorous, but I was the one who had to...

It began to dawn on me that perhaps my country needed me more at home...

It began to dawn on me that perhaps my country needed me more at home...

Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days.

Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days.

Hey, I may loathe myself, but it has nothing to do with the fact that...

Hey, I may loathe myself, but it has nothing to do with the fact that...

It's not every day that you get to be affectionate around something, it just doesn't...

It's not every day that you get to be affectionate around something, it just doesn't...

I just feed off the energy of the audience.

I just feed off the energy of the audience.

I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at...

I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at...

Even though the National Guard and Army Reserve see combat today, it rankles me that...

Even though the National Guard and Army Reserve see combat today, it rankles me that...

I couldn't be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the...

I couldn't be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the...

You write about what you know.

You write about what you know.

Every relationship is just so tenuous and precarious.

Every relationship is just so tenuous and precarious.

I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.

I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.

There are times when I'm driving home after a day's shooting, thinking to myself, That...

There are times when I'm driving home after a day's shooting, thinking to myself, That...