If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.

Quote by Scott Adams

Topics: Scott Adams Quotes

The longer you work here, diverse it gets.

The longer you work here, diverse it gets.

The only risk of failure is promotion.

The only risk of failure is promotion.

Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

Creativity is allowing oneself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

A good metaphor can make any bad idea sound good.

A good metaphor can make any bad idea sound good.

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a...

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a...

As a rule, anything in a binder has very little value, except as building material.

As a rule, anything in a binder has very little value, except as building material.

If a job's worth doing, it's too hard.

If a job's worth doing, it's too hard.

In Japan, employees occasionally work themselves to death. It's called Karoshi. I don't want that...

In Japan, employees occasionally work themselves to death. It's called Karoshi. I don't want that...

Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge.

Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge.

Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create...

Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create...

Technology: No Place for Wimps!

Technology: No Place for Wimps!

Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look...

Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look...

All vendor demos are boring. It's the law, I think.

All vendor demos are boring. It's the law, I think.

If a job's worth doing, it's too hard.

If a job's worth doing, it's too hard.

Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look...

Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look...

You don't have to be a person of influence to be influential. In fact, the...

You don't have to be a person of influence to be influential. In fact, the...

Never base your budget requests on realistic assumptions, as this could lead to a decrease...

Never base your budget requests on realistic assumptions, as this could lead to a decrease...

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure.

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure.

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask?...

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask?...

Most success springs from an obstacle or failure. I became a cartoonist largely because I...

Most success springs from an obstacle or failure. I became a cartoonist largely because I...