If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.

Quote by Dean Martin

Topics: Drink Quotes

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

There's a statue of Jimmy Stewart in the Hollywood Wax Museum, and the statue talks...

There's a statue of Jimmy Stewart in the Hollywood Wax Museum, and the statue talks...

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and...

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and...

I've got seven kids. The three words you hear most around my house are 'hello,'...

I've got seven kids. The three words you hear most around my house are 'hello,'...

I'd hate to be a teetotaler. Imagine getting up in the morning and knowing that's...

I'd hate to be a teetotaler. Imagine getting up in the morning and knowing that's...

I've got seven kids, the three words you hear most around my house are: Hello,...

I've got seven kids, the three words you hear most around my house are: Hello,...

Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show...

Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show...

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.

I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.

My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.

My education was dismal. I went to a series of schools for mentally disturbed teachers.

I would rather have an inferiority complex and be pleasantly surprised, than have a superiority...

I would rather have an inferiority complex and be pleasantly surprised, than have a superiority...

I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be...

I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be...

Give beer to those who are perishing, wine to those who are in anguish.

Give beer to those who are perishing, wine to those who are in anguish.

The other day I went to the Huddle House. I wasnt hungry, I just wanted...

The other day I went to the Huddle House. I wasnt hungry, I just wanted...

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was....

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was....

A push up bra is like a bag of chips; you open the bag and...

A push up bra is like a bag of chips; you open the bag and...

Television has brought back murder into the home - where it belongs.

Television has brought back murder into the home - where it belongs.

The greatest thing in family life is to take a hint when a hint is...

The greatest thing in family life is to take a hint when a hint is...

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job

The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be...

The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be...

If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?

If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?