If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want fries with that?'

Quote by John Cleese

Topics: Funny Quotes, Putdowns Quotes

When the target audience is American teenage kids, you can have problems. My generation prized...

When the target audience is American teenage kids, you can have problems. My generation prized...

I can't tell you how scary it can be walking onto a movie and suddenly...

I can't tell you how scary it can be walking onto a movie and suddenly...

But then acting is all about faking. We're all very good at faking things that...

But then acting is all about faking. We're all very good at faking things that...

Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited.

Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited.

A man will give up almost anything except his suffering.

A man will give up almost anything except his suffering.

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make...

If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make...

I used to desire many, many things, but now I have just one desire, and...

I used to desire many, many things, but now I have just one desire, and...

For me, the great problem growing up in England was that I had a very...

For me, the great problem growing up in England was that I had a very...

I was very sad to hear of the death of Ronnie Barker, who was such...

I was very sad to hear of the death of Ronnie Barker, who was such...

God was treated like this powerful, erratic, rather punitive father who has to be pacified...

God was treated like this powerful, erratic, rather punitive father who has to be pacified...

I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent...

I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent...

I tend to have an odd split in my mind: I tend to look at...

I tend to have an odd split in my mind: I tend to look at...

Don't let anyone tell you what you ought to like... Some wines that some experts...

Don't let anyone tell you what you ought to like... Some wines that some experts...

Oh, I could spend my life having this conversation - look - please try to...

Oh, I could spend my life having this conversation - look - please try to...

I can never do better than Fawlty Towers whatever I do. Now I very much...

I can never do better than Fawlty Towers whatever I do. Now I very much...

The really good idea is always traceable back quite a long way, often to a...

The really good idea is always traceable back quite a long way, often to a...

It seems astounding to me now that the video games are perhaps as important as...

It seems astounding to me now that the video games are perhaps as important as...

The thrill I got discovering Buster Keaton when I was growing up was so exciting....

The thrill I got discovering Buster Keaton when I was growing up was so exciting....

I think that sometimes you do something that makes a small group of people laugh,...

I think that sometimes you do something that makes a small group of people laugh,...

I want to write a book which is the history of comedy.

I want to write a book which is the history of comedy.