I'd love to kiss you, but I just washed my hair.

Quote by Bette Davis

Topics: Funny Quotes, Putdowns Quotes

I survived because I was tougher than anybody else.

I survived because I was tougher than anybody else.

Men become much more attractive when they start looking older. But it doesn't do much...

Men become much more attractive when they start looking older. But it doesn't do much...

Gay Liberation? I ain't against it, it's just that there's nothing in it for me.

Gay Liberation? I ain't against it, it's just that there's nothing in it for me.

Men become much more attractive when they start looking older. But it doesn't do much...

Men become much more attractive when they start looking older. But it doesn't do much...

I have often seen an actor laugh off the stage, but I don't remember ever...

I have often seen an actor laugh off the stage, but I don't remember ever...

I will not retire while I've still got my legs and my make-up box.

I will not retire while I've still got my legs and my make-up box.

With the newspaper strike on, I wouldn't consider dying.

With the newspaper strike on, I wouldn't consider dying.

From the moment I was six I felt sexy. And let me tell you it...

From the moment I was six I felt sexy. And let me tell you it...

If you want a thing done well, get a couple of old broads to do...

If you want a thing done well, get a couple of old broads to do...

If you've never been hated by your child, you've never been a parent.

If you've never been hated by your child, you've never been a parent.

Business is the art of extracting money from another man's pocket without resorting to violence.

Business is the art of extracting money from another man's pocket without resorting to violence.

I wouldn't worry too much about your heart. You can always put that award where...

I wouldn't worry too much about your heart. You can always put that award where...

Old age is no place for sissies.

Old age is no place for sissies.

I will never be below the title.

I will never be below the title.

People often become actresses because of something they dislike about themselves: They pretend they are...

People often become actresses because of something they dislike about themselves: They pretend they are...

The best time I ever had with Joan Crawford was when I pushed her down...

The best time I ever had with Joan Crawford was when I pushed her down...

I've always liked men better than women.

I've always liked men better than women.

To look back is to relax one's vigil.

To look back is to relax one's vigil.

Basically, I believe the world is a jungle, and if it's not a bit of...

Basically, I believe the world is a jungle, and if it's not a bit of...

It is my last wish to be burried sitting up.

It is my last wish to be burried sitting up.