I never lack material for my humor column when Congress is in session.

Quote by Will Rogers

Topics: Humor Quotes

The difference between a Republican and a Democrat is the Democrat is a cannibal they...

The difference between a Republican and a Democrat is the Democrat is a cannibal they...

The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is...

The more you observe politics, the more you've got to admit that each party is...

I have always said that a conference was held for one reason only, to give...

I have always said that a conference was held for one reason only, to give...

Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium; unsuccessful ones will start hunting...

Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium; unsuccessful ones will start hunting...

The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that...

The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that...

You've got to be (an) optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be...

You've got to be (an) optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be...

In a real estate man's eye, the most expensive part of the city is where...

In a real estate man's eye, the most expensive part of the city is where...

People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.

People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.

The schools ain't what they used to be and never was.

The schools ain't what they used to be and never was.

Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works...

Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works...

There comes Coolidge and does nothing and retires a hero, not only because he hadn't...

There comes Coolidge and does nothing and retires a hero, not only because he hadn't...

Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to...

Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to...

The best way out of a difficulty is through it.

The best way out of a difficulty is through it.

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for...

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for...

I don't know what humor is. Anything that's funny -- tragedy or anything, it don't...

I don't know what humor is. Anything that's funny -- tragedy or anything, it don't...

I tell you, all politics is apple sauce.

I tell you, all politics is apple sauce.

Never let yesterday use up too much of today.

Never let yesterday use up too much of today.

Chaotic action is preferable to orderly inaction.

Chaotic action is preferable to orderly inaction.

Don't think, just do.

Don't think, just do.

We are face to face with our destiny and we must meet it with a...

We are face to face with our destiny and we must meet it with a...