I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.

Quote by Jackie Mason

Topics: Funny Quotes, Money Quotes

It is more profitable for your congressman to support the tobacco industry than your life.

It is more profitable for your congressman to support the tobacco industry than your life.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy...

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy...

It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness...

It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness...

It is more profitable for your congressman to support the tobacco industry than your life.

It is more profitable for your congressman to support the tobacco industry than your life.

Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant - even if they wanted to...

Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant - even if they wanted to...

If an Englishman gets run down by a truck he apologizes to the truck.

If an Englishman gets run down by a truck he apologizes to the truck.