It is more profitable for your congressman to support the tobacco industry than your life.

Quote by Jackie Mason

Topics: Jackie Mason Quotes

Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant - even if they wanted to...

Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant - even if they wanted to...

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy...

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy...

It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness...

It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness...

It is more profitable for your congressman to support the tobacco industry than your life.

It is more profitable for your congressman to support the tobacco industry than your life.

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy...

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy...

If an Englishman gets run down by a truck he apologizes to the truck.

If an Englishman gets run down by a truck he apologizes to the truck.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people...

Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people...

We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities.

We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities.

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the...

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the...

When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a...

When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a...

If you don't believe in ghosts, you've never been to a family reunion.

If you don't believe in ghosts, you've never been to a family reunion.

I'm a controversial figure: my friends either dislike me or hate me.

I'm a controversial figure: my friends either dislike me or hate me.

I think that's how Chicago got started. A bunch of people in New York said,...

I think that's how Chicago got started. A bunch of people in New York said,...

Children also have artistic ability, and there is wisdom in there having it! The more...

Children also have artistic ability, and there is wisdom in there having it! The more...

If Google can't find the answer, it's not a question.

If Google can't find the answer, it's not a question.

There are now more TV's in British households than there are people - which is...

There are now more TV's in British households than there are people - which is...

Nature gave men two ends - one to sit on and one to think with....

Nature gave men two ends - one to sit on and one to think with....

We must laugh at man to avoid crying for him.

We must laugh at man to avoid crying for him.

Example isn't another way to teach, it is the only way to teach.

Example isn't another way to teach, it is the only way to teach.

Marriage is like a beleaguered fortress: those who are outside want to get in, and...

Marriage is like a beleaguered fortress: those who are outside want to get in, and...