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A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks, a woman loses hers after...

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A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks, a woman loses hers after...

Love is like war; easy to begin but very hard to stop.

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Love is like war; easy to begin but very hard to stop.

Christmas is a race to see which gives out first - your money or your...

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Christmas is a race to see which gives out first - your money or your...

Relationships nowadays = 1 male 1 female 1 hoe 1 ex trying to mess it...

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Relationships nowadays = 1 male 1 female 1 hoe 1 ex trying to mess it...

Gravity is not responsible for people falling in love.

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Gravity is not responsible for people falling in love.

When a baby is staring at you and their parents aren't looking

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When a baby is staring at you and their parents aren't looking

It symbolize that she's my property and I own her

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It symbolize that she's my property and I own her

If he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs, send him to KFC

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If he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs, send him to KFC

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just...

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I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just...

It's funny how you can tell someone likes someone else, but you can't tell when...

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It's funny how you can tell someone likes someone else, but you can't tell when...

I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot

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I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

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Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

Hate to see you leave but love to watch you go. Cause of your butt.

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Hate to see you leave but love to watch you go. Cause of your butt.

I want your ugly I want your disease I want your love love I want...

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I want your ugly I want your disease I want your love love I want...

The only time you should look in your neighbor's bowl is to make sure that...

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The only time you should look in your neighbor's bowl is to make sure that...

Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start...

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Don't have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start...

When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. No one showed...

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When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. No one showed...

Do you have any books about making friends?

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Do you have any books about making friends?

A witty saying proves nothing

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A witty saying proves nothing

Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is...

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Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is...

Worrying is a waste of time. It doesn't change anything. It messes with your mind...

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Worrying is a waste of time. It doesn't change anything. It messes with your mind...

The best love is the one that makes you a better person, without changing you...

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The best love is the one that makes you a better person, without changing you...