Everything I like is either illegal, immoral, fattening, expensive or impossible

Everything I like is either illegal, immoral, fattening, expensive or impossible

Topics: Funny Picture Quotes, Like Picture Quotes, Morals Picture Quotes, Pleasure Picture Quotes

Haloween=candy Thanksgiving=food Christmas=gifts New Year=drinks Valentines=sex Birthday=All the above.jpg

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Haloween=candy Thanksgiving=food Christmas=gifts New Year=drinks Valentines=sex Birthday=All the above.jpg

The only reason I'm fat is because a tiny body couldn't store all this personality.

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The only reason I'm fat is because a tiny body couldn't store all this personality.

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal and a good woman or a bad woman....

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Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal and a good woman or a bad woman....

A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted

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A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted

The lovely thing about being forty is that you can appreciate twenty-five-year-old men

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The lovely thing about being forty is that you can appreciate twenty-five-year-old men

New Year's Resolutions This year I resolve to be more democratic and I've made a...

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New Year's Resolutions This year I resolve to be more democratic and I've made a...

I like nonsense it wakes up the brain cells

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I like nonsense it wakes up the brain cells

What I feel like when I stop at a red light next to the ladies......

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What I feel like when I stop at a red light next to the ladies......

Dear Santa, if you leave a new bike under the tree, I will give you...

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Dear Santa, if you leave a new bike under the tree, I will give you...

Video games don't affect kids. If Pacman had affected us as kids, we'd all be...

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Video games don't affect kids. If Pacman had affected us as kids, we'd all be...

Falling in love is like being the frog disected in biology class. They open you...

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Falling in love is like being the frog disected in biology class. They open you...

A woman is worried about the future until she gets a husband, while a man...

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A woman is worried about the future until she gets a husband, while a man...

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance.There's no doubt about it.Anytime you have a...

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Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance.There's no doubt about it.Anytime you have a...

The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get

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The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get

The advantage of being a freak is it makes you stronger

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The advantage of being a freak is it makes you stronger

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays...

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An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays...

We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance

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We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance

Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to the their level and...

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Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to the their level and...

When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.

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When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.

Don't change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love...

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Don't change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love...

He who permits himself to tell a lie once, finds it easier to do it...

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He who permits himself to tell a lie once, finds it easier to do it...

Love ceases to be a pleasure when it ceases to be a secret

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Love ceases to be a pleasure when it ceases to be a secret