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A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks, a woman loses hers after...

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A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks, a woman loses hers after...

The great secret of happiness in love is to be glad that the other fellow...

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The great secret of happiness in love is to be glad that the other fellow...

The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is...

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The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is...

There are some things you don't want to hear. Here's something I don't want to...

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There are some things you don't want to hear. Here's something I don't want to...

It is easier to be a lover than a husband for the simple reason that...

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It is easier to be a lover than a husband for the simple reason that...

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance.There's no doubt about it.Anytime you have a...

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Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance.There's no doubt about it.Anytime you have a...

Why Trick or Treating is better than Sex? You can do the whole neighborhood.

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Why Trick or Treating is better than Sex? You can do the whole neighborhood.

Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you...

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Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you...

An old man: You're Dr. House, aren't you? House: Oh God, don´t tell we used...

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An old man: You're Dr. House, aren't you? House: Oh God, don´t tell we used...

My tremendous intuitive sense of the female creature informs me that you are troubled.

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My tremendous intuitive sense of the female creature informs me that you are troubled.

There's more to life than beer, but who cares

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There's more to life than beer, but who cares

Relationships nowadays = 1 male 1 female 1 hoe 1 ex trying to mess it...

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Relationships nowadays = 1 male 1 female 1 hoe 1 ex trying to mess it...

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep...

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I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep...

It's funny how you can tell someone likes someone else, but you can't tell when...

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It's funny how you can tell someone likes someone else, but you can't tell when...

Time spent with cats is never wasted

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Time spent with cats is never wasted

You know we're good friends when I no longer feel the need to clean up...

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You know we're good friends when I no longer feel the need to clean up...

There are only two reasons to date a girl you’ve already dated: breast implants.

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There are only two reasons to date a girl you’ve already dated: breast implants.

Twenty year olds fall in and out of love more often than they change their...

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Twenty year olds fall in and out of love more often than they change their...

I'm pretty sure the whole "ladies first" when opening up a door was created by...

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I'm pretty sure the whole

Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree; Your ornaments are history.

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Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree; Your ornaments are history.

Life is not always not always what one wants it to be., but to make...

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Life is not always not always what one wants it to be., but to make...

Liking someone doesn’t mean you have to be lovers, sometimes you just have to be...

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Liking someone doesn’t mean you have to be lovers, sometimes you just have to be...