I haven't taken my Christmas lights down. They look so nice on the pumpkin.

Quote by Winston Spear

Topics: Funny Quotes, Jokes Quotes

I haven't taken my Christmas lights down. They look so nice on the pumpkin.

I haven't taken my Christmas lights down. They look so nice on the pumpkin.

A graceful and honorable old age is the childhood of immortality.

A graceful and honorable old age is the childhood of immortality.

Just at the age 'twixt boy and youth, When thought is speech, and speech is...

Just at the age 'twixt boy and youth, When thought is speech, and speech is...

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank...

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank...

One with God is a majority.

One with God is a majority.

If you don't run your own life, somebody else will.

If you don't run your own life, somebody else will.

When its a question of money, everybody is of the same religion.

When its a question of money, everybody is of the same religion.

The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in...

The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in...

The difference between golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie.

The difference between golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie.

The average Americans day planner has fewer holes in it than Ray Charless dart board.

The average Americans day planner has fewer holes in it than Ray Charless dart board.

Sister to sister we will always be, a couple of nuts off the family tree.

Sister to sister we will always be, a couple of nuts off the family tree.

We tried not to age, but Time had its rage.

We tried not to age, but Time had its rage.

I was so poor growing up...if I wasn't a boy...I'd have nothing to play with.

I was so poor growing up...if I wasn't a boy...I'd have nothing to play with.

If one age believes too much it is natural that another believes too little.

If one age believes too much it is natural that another believes too little.

Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show...

Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show...

Good taste and humour...are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore.

Good taste and humour...are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore.

He who is of calm and happy nature will hardly feel the pressure of age,...

He who is of calm and happy nature will hardly feel the pressure of age,...

Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.

Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.

The people and circumstances around me do not make me what I am, they reveal...

The people and circumstances around me do not make me what I am, they reveal...