You're only as good as your last haircut.

Quote by Fran Lebowitz

Topics: Funny Quotes

If you're going to America, bring your own food.

If you're going to America, bring your own food.

Humility is no substitute for a good personality.

Humility is no substitute for a good personality.

Andy Warhol made fame more famous.

Andy Warhol made fame more famous.

Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat...

Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat...

Women who insist upon having the same options as men would do well to consider...

Women who insist upon having the same options as men would do well to consider...

Humility is no substitute for a good personality.

Humility is no substitute for a good personality.

No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he...

No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he...

Special-interest publications should realize that if they are attracting enough advertising and readers to make...

Special-interest publications should realize that if they are attracting enough advertising and readers to make...

I must take issue with the term 'a mere child,' for it has been my...

I must take issue with the term 'a mere child,' for it has been my...

Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage of your life when...

Remember that as a teenager you are at the last stage of your life when...

If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be...

If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be...

Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is...

Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is...

There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death. Any...

There is no such thing as inner peace. There is only nervousness or death. Any...

My favorite animal is steak.

My favorite animal is steak.

Educational television should be absolutely forbidden. It can only lead to unreasonable disappointment when your...

Educational television should be absolutely forbidden. It can only lead to unreasonable disappointment when your...

Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.

Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.

Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.

Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

My mother had morning sickness after I was born.

My mother had morning sickness after I was born.

I try to do the right thing with money. Save a dollar here and there,...

I try to do the right thing with money. Save a dollar here and there,...