Women are like elephants to me: nice to look at, but I wouldn't want to own one.

Quote by WC Fields

Topics: Funny Quotes, Women Quotes

A woman drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank...

A woman drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank...

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food!

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food!

All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.

All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.

A man's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink

A man's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.

I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.

Women are like Elephants. I like to watch them, but I wouldn't want to own...

Women are like Elephants. I like to watch them, but I wouldn't want to own...

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from...

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from...

By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and...

By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and...

The perceptions of middle age have their own luminosity.

The perceptions of middle age have their own luminosity.

I wanna live 'til I die, no more, no less.

I wanna live 'til I die, no more, no less.

Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.

Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.

So a man jumps into a taxi and says King Arthur's close and the taxi...

So a man jumps into a taxi and says King Arthur's close and the taxi...

If you can't afford taking your kids to the Zoo, try taking them to Wal-Mart...its...

If you can't afford taking your kids to the Zoo, try taking them to Wal-Mart...its...

The best example of democracy I can recall is five wolves sitting down to dinner...

The best example of democracy I can recall is five wolves sitting down to dinner...

The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one is...

The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one is...

I don't worry about it because we are all growing old. If I were the...

I don't worry about it because we are all growing old. If I were the...

French wine growers fear that this year's vintage may be entirely spoiled due to the...

French wine growers fear that this year's vintage may be entirely spoiled due to the...

So one day as a kid I was at the local Zoo. I was bored...

So one day as a kid I was at the local Zoo. I was bored...

Today is 'Take our Daughters to Work Day.' This is when girls ages Nine to...

Today is 'Take our Daughters to Work Day.' This is when girls ages Nine to...

A man is given the choice between loving women and understanding them.

A man is given the choice between loving women and understanding them.