Well, excuuuuuse me!

Quote by Steve Martin

Topics: Steve Martin Quotes

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.

There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught...

There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught...

Comedy may be big business but it isn't pretty.

Comedy may be big business but it isn't pretty.

Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke

Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke

An apology? Bah! Disgusting! Cowardly! Beneath the dignity of any gentleman, however wrong he might...

An apology? Bah! Disgusting! Cowardly! Beneath the dignity of any gentleman, however wrong he might...

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money...

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money...

When your hobbies get in the way of your work - that's OK; but when...

When your hobbies get in the way of your work - that's OK; but when...

All I've ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work.

All I've ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work.

You know what your problem is, it's that you haven't seen enough movies - all...

You know what your problem is, it's that you haven't seen enough movies - all...

I believe in eight of the ten commandments; and I believe in going to church...

I believe in eight of the ten commandments; and I believe in going to church...

I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if you...

I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, and can become art, but if you...

What is comedy? Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.

What is comedy? Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.

Love is a promise delivered already broken.

Love is a promise delivered already broken.

There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught...

There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught...

Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!

Boy, those French: they have a different word for everything!

I believe that Ronald Reagan will someday make this country what it once was... an...

I believe that Ronald Reagan will someday make this country what it once was... an...

Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order...

Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order...

First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease...

First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease...

After you find out all the things that can go wrong, your life becomes less...

After you find out all the things that can go wrong, your life becomes less...

The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature cures the disease.

The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature cures the disease.