Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.

Quote by Bill Watterson

Topics: Funny Quotes, Weekend Quotes

From now on, I'll connect the dots my own way.

From now on, I'll connect the dots my own way.

It's surprising how hard we'll work when the work is done just for ourselves.

It's surprising how hard we'll work when the work is done just for ourselves.

The purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure pure reasoning, and inhibit clarity....

The purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure pure reasoning, and inhibit clarity....

There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.

There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.

Letting your mind play is the best way to solve problems.

Letting your mind play is the best way to solve problems.

Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess.

Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess.

If your knees aren't green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously...

If your knees aren't green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously...

God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now...

God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now...

I say, when life gives you a lemon, wing it right back and add some...

I say, when life gives you a lemon, wing it right back and add some...

If you can't control your peanut butter, you can't expect to control your life.

If you can't control your peanut butter, you can't expect to control your life.

I thought my life would seem more interesting with a musical score and a laugh...

I thought my life would seem more interesting with a musical score and a laugh...

It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.

It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.

When birds burp, it must taste like bugs.

When birds burp, it must taste like bugs.

I liked things better when I didn't understand them.

I liked things better when I didn't understand them.

Oh look, yet another Christmas TV special! How touching to have the meaning of Christmas...

Oh look, yet another Christmas TV special! How touching to have the meaning of Christmas...

I won't eat any cereal that doesn't turn the milk purple.

I won't eat any cereal that doesn't turn the milk purple.

Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.

Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.

The problem with people is that they're only human.

The problem with people is that they're only human.

There is a great deal of human nature in man.

There is a great deal of human nature in man.

Most people don't believe something can happen until it already has. That's not stupidity or...

Most people don't believe something can happen until it already has. That's not stupidity or...

Guilty people answer questions with a question.

Guilty people answer questions with a question.