Twas a woman who drove me to drink. I never had the courtesy to thank her.

Quote by WCFields

Topics: Drink Quotes, Funny Quotes

Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first...

Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child - if you parboil them first...

If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a...

If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a...

A man's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink.

A man's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink.

Start every day with a smile and get it over with.

Start every day with a smile and get it over with.

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at...

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at...

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank...

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank...

I would lead thee, and bring thee into my mother's house, who would instruct me:...

I would lead thee, and bring thee into my mother's house, who would instruct me:...

Come swish around, my pretty punk, And keep me dancing still That I may stay...

Come swish around, my pretty punk, And keep me dancing still That I may stay...

For when I had brought them into the land, for the which I lifted up...

For when I had brought them into the land, for the which I lifted up...

Claret is the liquor for boys; port, for men; but he who aspires to be...

Claret is the liquor for boys; port, for men; but he who aspires to be...

And Elijah said unto Ahab, Get thee up, eat and drink; for there is a...

And Elijah said unto Ahab, Get thee up, eat and drink; for there is a...

Then the woman came and told her husband, saying, A man of God came unto...

Then the woman came and told her husband, saying, A man of God came unto...

A wonderful drink, wine. . . . Did you ever hear of an Italian grape...

A wonderful drink, wine. . . . Did you ever hear of an Italian grape...

Forasmuch therefore as your treading is upon the poor, and ye take from him burdens...

Forasmuch therefore as your treading is upon the poor, and ye take from him burdens...

They gave money also unto the masons, and to the carpenters; and meat, and drink,...

They gave money also unto the masons, and to the carpenters; and meat, and drink,...

Eat thy bread with joy, and drink thy wine with a merry heart.

Eat thy bread with joy, and drink thy wine with a merry heart.

For behold, I, God, have asuffered¢ these things for all, that they might not suffer...

For behold, I, God, have asuffered¢ these things for all, that they might not suffer...

And he took the calf which they had made, and burnt it in the fire,...

And he took the calf which they had made, and burnt it in the fire,...

Science is some kind of cosmic apple juice from the Garden of Eden. Those who...

Science is some kind of cosmic apple juice from the Garden of Eden. Those who...

Leopards break into the temple and drink the sacrificial chalices dry; this occurs repeatedly, again...

Leopards break into the temple and drink the sacrificial chalices dry; this occurs repeatedly, again...

Where love is concerned, too much is not even enough.

Where love is concerned, too much is not even enough.