Theyre talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place thats used by ten or more people in a week, which, I guess, means that Madonna cant even smoke in bed.

Quote by Bill Maher

Topics: Awesome Quotes, Funny Quotes

It's all been satirized for your protection.

It's all been satirized for your protection.

This has been a learning experience for me. I also thought that privacy was something...

This has been a learning experience for me. I also thought that privacy was something...

If I wanted to have wooden sex with strings attached I'd get married. In reference...

If I wanted to have wooden sex with strings attached I'd get married. In reference...

Little do women know what big ideas I have in my pants.

Little do women know what big ideas I have in my pants.

The country has become much more conservative, partly because it's been taken over by the...

The country has become much more conservative, partly because it's been taken over by the...

And to answer the question that people have about this conspiracy theory that he has...

And to answer the question that people have about this conspiracy theory that he has...

We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying...

We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying...

Fame has sent a number of celebrities off the deep end, and in the case...

Fame has sent a number of celebrities off the deep end, and in the case...

Men are only as loyal as their options

Men are only as loyal as their options

President Bush is supporting Arnold but a lot of Republicans are not, because he is...

President Bush is supporting Arnold but a lot of Republicans are not, because he is...

Men are only as loyal as their options.

Men are only as loyal as their options.

If you think you have it tough, read history books.

If you think you have it tough, read history books.

Maybe every other American movie shouldn't be based on a comic book. Other countries will...

Maybe every other American movie shouldn't be based on a comic book. Other countries will...

Clinton left the White House with all the class of an XFL halftime show.

Clinton left the White House with all the class of an XFL halftime show.

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

Janet Jackson's 'wardrobe malfunction' cost CBS Five hundred and Fifty grand this week. Boy, what...

Janet Jackson's 'wardrobe malfunction' cost CBS Five hundred and Fifty grand this week. Boy, what...

Abstinence is a perversion.

Abstinence is a perversion.

Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make...

Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make...

Presidents do make mistakes, but the immortal Dante tells us that divine justice weighs the...

Presidents do make mistakes, but the immortal Dante tells us that divine justice weighs the...

Our mistakes don't make or break us - if we're lucky, they simply reveal who...

Our mistakes don't make or break us - if we're lucky, they simply reveal who...