Theyre talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place thats used by ten or more people in a week, which, I guess, means that Madonna cant even smoke in bed.

Quote by Bill Maher

Topics: Awesome Quotes, Funny Quotes

I think religion is bad and drugs are good.

I think religion is bad and drugs are good.

The Bible looks like it started out as a game of Mad Libs.

The Bible looks like it started out as a game of Mad Libs.

Nobody sees people as people. It's all how they relate to my little group.

Nobody sees people as people. It's all how they relate to my little group.

I think capital punishment works great. Every killer you kill never kills again.

I think capital punishment works great. Every killer you kill never kills again.

Fame has sent a number of celebrities off the deep end, and in the case...

Fame has sent a number of celebrities off the deep end, and in the case...

The jury could get the case as early as next week, but the defense says...

The jury could get the case as early as next week, but the defense says...

If you think you have it tough, read history books.

If you think you have it tough, read history books.

President Bush is supporting Arnold but a lot of Republicans are not, because he is...

President Bush is supporting Arnold but a lot of Republicans are not, because he is...

Things aren't right. If a burglar breaks into your home and you shoot him, he...

Things aren't right. If a burglar breaks into your home and you shoot him, he...

Curious people are intersting people, I wonder why that is.

Curious people are intersting people, I wonder why that is.

We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels and free...

We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels and free...

Jim Bakker spells his name with two k's because three would be too obvious.

Jim Bakker spells his name with two k's because three would be too obvious.

Hi, I'm Bill. I'm a birth survivor.

Hi, I'm Bill. I'm a birth survivor.

My wife always has a splitting archetype whenever I want to have sex.

My wife always has a splitting archetype whenever I want to have sex.

Suicide is man's way of telling God, You can't fire me - I quit.

Suicide is man's way of telling God, You can't fire me - I quit.

When you want to make it clear to the rest of the world that you...

When you want to make it clear to the rest of the world that you...

A lot of good has come from drugs. I think 'Penny Lane' is worth 10...

A lot of good has come from drugs. I think 'Penny Lane' is worth 10...

What Democratic congressmen do to their women staffers, Republican congressmen do to the country.

What Democratic congressmen do to their women staffers, Republican congressmen do to the country.

Pride and dignity would belong to women if only men would leave them alone

Pride and dignity would belong to women if only men would leave them alone

Does feminist mean large unpleasant person who'll shout at you or someone who believes women...

Does feminist mean large unpleasant person who'll shout at you or someone who believes women...