There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at all.

Quote by Ogden Nash

Topics: Funny Quotes, Happiness Quotes

Commitments the voters don't know about can't hurt you.

Commitments the voters don't know about can't hurt you.

Love is a word that is constantly heard, Hate is a word that is not....

Love is a word that is constantly heard, Hate is a word that is not....

Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit...

To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit...

If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so...

If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so...

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone...

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone...

Never befriend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor

Never befriend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.

Your hair may be brushed, but your mind's untidy. You've had about seven hours of...

Your hair may be brushed, but your mind's untidy. You've had about seven hours of...

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era...

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era...

Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?

Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are...

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are...

Door: What a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

Door: What a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave, when they think their children are naÃ¯ve.

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave, when they think their children are naÃ¯ve.

I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to...

I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to...

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Daybreak is one of the greatest disadvantages of living under the solar system: It means...

Daybreak is one of the greatest disadvantages of living under the solar system: It means...

Death is not extinguishing the light; it is only putting out the lamp because the...

Death is not extinguishing the light; it is only putting out the lamp because the...

One of the strange things about living in the world is that it is only...

One of the strange things about living in the world is that it is only...