President Bush has said that he does not need approval from the UN to wage war, and I'm thinking, well, hell, he didn't need the approval of the American voters to become president, either.

Quote by David Letterman

Topics: David Letterman Quotes

We inadvertently bombed the Chinese Embassy. But Clinton now is working very hard. He has...

We inadvertently bombed the Chinese Embassy. But Clinton now is working very hard. He has...

Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.

Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.

Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall...

Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall...

Iraq's elite Republican Guard is doing so badly they're changing their name to the Democratic...

Iraq's elite Republican Guard is doing so badly they're changing their name to the Democratic...

The big debate right now is if Saddam is alive or dead. He's dead, then...

The big debate right now is if Saddam is alive or dead. He's dead, then...

We make a lot of fun at President Clinton's expense. But this transition is going...

We make a lot of fun at President Clinton's expense. But this transition is going...

Dick Cheney said he was running again. He said his health was fine, 'I've got...

Dick Cheney said he was running again. He said his health was fine, 'I've got...

People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete...

People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete...

Yesterday Senator John Kerry changed his mind and now supports the ban on gay marriages....

Yesterday Senator John Kerry changed his mind and now supports the ban on gay marriages....

President Bush has been silent on Schwarzenegger. Of course, he can't pronounce Schwarzenegger.

President Bush has been silent on Schwarzenegger. Of course, he can't pronounce Schwarzenegger.

There is no off position on the genius switch.

There is no off position on the genius switch.

Sometimes something worth doing is worth overdoing.

Sometimes something worth doing is worth overdoing.

Number one: Don't frisk me. Don't hurt me physically. Don't get anywhere near my neck....

Number one: Don't frisk me. Don't hurt me physically. Don't get anywhere near my neck....

Don't forget it's daylight savings time. You spring forward, then you fall back. It's like...

Don't forget it's daylight savings time. You spring forward, then you fall back. It's like...

For the love of God, folks, don't try this at home.

For the love of God, folks, don't try this at home.

The weather here is gorgeous. It's mild and feels like it's in the eighties. The...

The weather here is gorgeous. It's mild and feels like it's in the eighties. The...

I had no idea this thing was televised. Boy, is my face red.

I had no idea this thing was televised. Boy, is my face red.

I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show...

I cannot sing, dance or act; what else would I be but a talk show...

New York... when civilization falls apart, remember, we were way ahead of you.

New York... when civilization falls apart, remember, we were way ahead of you.

It's so warm now, and Thanksgiving came so early - is it just me, or...

It's so warm now, and Thanksgiving came so early - is it just me, or...