No animal ever invented anything as bad as drunkenness - or as good as drink.

Quote by GKChesterton

Topics: Drink Quotes, Funny Quotes

To be clever enough to get all the money, one must be stupid enough to...

To be clever enough to get all the money, one must be stupid enough to...

A good novel tells us the truth about it's hero; but a bad novel tells...

A good novel tells us the truth about it's hero; but a bad novel tells...

I believe in getting into hot water. I think it keeps you clean.

I believe in getting into hot water. I think it keeps you clean.

You cannot grow a beard in a moment of passion.

You cannot grow a beard in a moment of passion.

Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.

Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.

I frankly felt like the reception we received on the way in from the airport...

I frankly felt like the reception we received on the way in from the airport...

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of...

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of...

'What do you fear my lady?' 'A cage. To stay behind bars until use and...

'What do you fear my lady?' 'A cage. To stay behind bars until use and...

The consumer isn't a moron; she is your wife.

The consumer isn't a moron; she is your wife.

As we grow older, our bodies get shorter and our anecdotes longer.

As we grow older, our bodies get shorter and our anecdotes longer.

I saw Hamlet Prince of Denmark played; but now the old plays begin to disgust...

I saw Hamlet Prince of Denmark played; but now the old plays begin to disgust...

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food!

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food!

Never wear anything that panics the cat.

Never wear anything that panics the cat.

[Reporter: How did you find America?] We turned left at Greenland.

[Reporter: How did you find America?] We turned left at Greenland.

Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept...

Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept...

The execs don't care what color you are. They care about how much money you...

The execs don't care what color you are. They care about how much money you...

The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on...

The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on...

What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.

What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.

The veracity which increases with old age is not far from folly.

The veracity which increases with old age is not far from folly.

Seems to me the basic conflict between men and women, sexually, is that men are...

Seems to me the basic conflict between men and women, sexually, is that men are...