New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved.
Quote by Johnny Carson
Johnny Carson Quotes
We're more effective than birth control pills.
The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money.
I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and...
The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money
My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day.
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was...
If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
In Hollywood if you don't have a shrink, people think you're crazy.
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.
If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen...
Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his...
For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper...
Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas.
Happiness is sitting down to watch slides of your neighbor's vacation and finding out he...
The difference between a divorce and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives...
If variety if the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam
Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow...
Democracy is finding proximate solutions to insoluble problems.
Democracy! Bah! When I hear that I reach for my feather Boa!
The way people in democracies think of the government as something different from themselves is...