If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.

Quote by Johnny Carson

Topics: Television Quotes

Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas.

New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved.

New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved.

I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was...

I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was...

If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.

If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.

For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper...

For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper...

Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing,...

Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing,...

The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money

The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money

My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day.

My success just evolved from working hard at the business at hand each day.

If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.

If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam.

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.

We're more effective than birth control pills.

We're more effective than birth control pills.

Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Mail your packages early so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing...

Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing...

Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing,...

Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing,...

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his...

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his...

The difference between a divorce and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives...

The difference between a divorce and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives...

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his...

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his...

Being brokenhearted is like having broken ribs. On the outside it looks like nothing's wrong,...

Being brokenhearted is like having broken ribs. On the outside it looks like nothing's wrong,...

Dear Tummy, sorry for all the butterflies. Dear Heart, sorry for the damage. Dear Brain,...

Dear Tummy, sorry for all the butterflies. Dear Heart, sorry for the damage. Dear Brain,...