Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake. That's called Houdini. Love is liking someone a lot.

Quote by Jack Handey

Topics: Weird Love Quotes

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first...

Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first...

Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead. No, wait, not me, you.

Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead. No, wait, not me, you.

If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I...

If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I...

When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all...

When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all...

A funny thing is if you're out hiking and your friend gets bit by a...

A funny thing is if you're out hiking and your friend gets bit by a...

It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking...

It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking...

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh...

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh...

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the...

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the...

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it

I wish I would have a real tragic love affair and get so bummed out...

I wish I would have a real tragic love affair and get so bummed out...

Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake....

Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake....

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

If your friend is already dead, and being eaten by vultures, I think it's okay...

If your friend is already dead, and being eaten by vultures, I think it's okay...

Whenever someone asks me to define love, I usually think for a minute, then I...

Whenever someone asks me to define love, I usually think for a minute, then I...

If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then...

If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then...

If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadores came...

If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadores came...

True Love burns the brightest, But the brightest flames leave the deepest scars.

True Love burns the brightest, But the brightest flames leave the deepest scars.

Both hands... Now use both hands. Oh no, don't close your eyes.

Both hands... Now use both hands. Oh no, don't close your eyes.

'Why do we have to listen to our hearts?' 'Because, wherever your heart is, that...

'Why do we have to listen to our hearts?' 'Because, wherever your heart is, that...