Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards.

Quote by Robert Orben

Topics: Robert Orben Quotes

What bothers me about TV is that it tends to take our minds off our...

What bothers me about TV is that it tends to take our minds off our...

There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the...

There are days when it takes all you've got just to keep up with the...

Inflation is the crabgrass in your savings.

Inflation is the crabgrass in your savings.

Quit worrying about your health. It will go away.

Quit worrying about your health. It will go away.

Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't...

Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't...

Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!'

Spring is God's way of saying, 'One more time!'

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed...

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed...

Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're...

Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're...

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.

If you can laugh together, you can work together

If you can laugh together, you can work together

More than ever before, Americans are suffering from back problems: back taxes, back rent, back...

More than ever before, Americans are suffering from back problems: back taxes, back rent, back...

Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the...

Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the...

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more...

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more...

Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.

Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator.

Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected.

Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected.

With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal!

With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal!

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.

Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I...

Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I...

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.

If you can laugh together, you can work together.

If you can laugh together, you can work together.