I envy people who drink -- at least they know what to blame everything on.

Quote by Oscar Levant

Topics: Drink Quotes, Funny Quotes

I have given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself.

I have given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself.

There are two sides to every question: my side and the wrong side.

There are two sides to every question: my side and the wrong side.

I think a lot of Bernstein - but not as much as he does.

I think a lot of Bernstein - but not as much as he does.

Strip away the phony tinsel of Hollywood and you'll find the real tinsel underneath.

Strip away the phony tinsel of Hollywood and you'll find the real tinsel underneath.

So little time, so little to do

So little time, so little to do

I am no more humble than my talents require.

I am no more humble than my talents require.

Underneath this flabby exterior is an enormous lack of character.

Underneath this flabby exterior is an enormous lack of character.

I can remember Doris Day before she was a virgin.

I can remember Doris Day before she was a virgin.

I have no trouble with y enemies. But my god damn friends... they are the...

I have no trouble with y enemies. But my god damn friends... they are the...

I don't drink; I don't like it - it makes me feel good.

I don't drink; I don't like it - it makes me feel good.

Schizophrenia beats dining alone.

Schizophrenia beats dining alone.

What the world needs is more geniuses with humility, there are so few of us...

What the world needs is more geniuses with humility, there are so few of us...

I have no trouble with my enemies. But my goddam friends,...they are the ones that...

I have no trouble with my enemies. But my goddam friends,...they are the ones that...

I'm a controversial figure: my friends either dislike me or hate me.

I'm a controversial figure: my friends either dislike me or hate me.

A pun is the lowest form of humor -- when you don't think of it...

A pun is the lowest form of humor -- when you don't think of it...

I envy people who drink - at least they know what to blame everything on.

I envy people who drink - at least they know what to blame everything on.

I have no trouble with y enemies. But my god damn friends... they are the...

I have no trouble with y enemies. But my god damn friends... they are the...

Once Dwight Eisenhower makes up his mind, he's full of indecision.

Once Dwight Eisenhower makes up his mind, he's full of indecision.

Behind the phony tinsel of Hollywood lies the real tinsel.

Behind the phony tinsel of Hollywood lies the real tinsel.

Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.

Every time I look at you I get a fierce desire to be lonesome.