I didn't get old on purpose, it just happened. If you're lucky, it could happen to you.

Quote by Andy Rooney

Topics: Andy Rooney Quotes

The dullest Olympic sport is curling, whatever 'curling' means.

The dullest Olympic sport is curling, whatever 'curling' means.

I don't pick subjects as much as they pick me.

I don't pick subjects as much as they pick me.

I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get...

I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get...

I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef...

I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef...

I hope all of you are going to fill out your census form when it...

I hope all of you are going to fill out your census form when it...

If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.

If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.

Nothing in fine print is ever good news.

Nothing in fine print is ever good news.

Because over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast implants and...

Because over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast implants and...

The only people who say worse things about politicians that reporters do are other politicians.

The only people who say worse things about politicians that reporters do are other politicians.

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a...

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a...

When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if...

When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if...

I dislike loud-mouthed patriots who think they like our country more than I do. Some...

I dislike loud-mouthed patriots who think they like our country more than I do. Some...

As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we...

As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we...

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.

Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.

I like ice hockey, but it's a frustrating game to watch. It's hard to keep...

I like ice hockey, but it's a frustrating game to watch. It's hard to keep...

All men are not created equal but should be treated as though they were under...

All men are not created equal but should be treated as though they were under...

I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more...

I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more...

The closing of a door can bring blessed privacy and comfort - the opening, terror....

The closing of a door can bring blessed privacy and comfort - the opening, terror....

The Super Bowl isn't for kids, I had a great time though and it was...

The Super Bowl isn't for kids, I had a great time though and it was...