I believe that the government that governs best is a government that governs least, and by these standards we have set up a fabulous government in Iraq.

Quote by Stephen Colbert

Topics: Humor Quotes

I wrote things for the school's newspaper, and - like all teenagers - I dabbled...

I wrote things for the school's newspaper, and - like all teenagers - I dabbled...

You shouldn't listen to us at all if you're looking for information. We don't take...

You shouldn't listen to us at all if you're looking for information. We don't take...

I don't like books, they're all fact, no heart.

I don't like books, they're all fact, no heart.

When the president decides something on Monday, he still believes it on Wednesday - no...

When the president decides something on Monday, he still believes it on Wednesday - no...

In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be actively ignorant. One motto...

In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be actively ignorant. One motto...

I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for...

I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for...

Isn't an agnostic just an atheist without balls?

Isn't an agnostic just an atheist without balls?

As God said to Job, Checkmate

As God said to Job, Checkmate

I can't prove it, but I can say it.

I can't prove it, but I can say it.

Truthiness is tearing apart our country, and I don't mean the argument over who came...

Truthiness is tearing apart our country, and I don't mean the argument over who came...

Believe in me, cause I don't believe in anything, and I wanna be someone to...

Believe in me, cause I don't believe in anything, and I wanna be someone to...

I don't trust books. They're all fact and no heart.

I don't trust books. They're all fact and no heart.

Truthiness is what you want the facts to be as opposed to what the facts...

Truthiness is what you want the facts to be as opposed to what the facts...

Even the weather page is in a state of moral decay. Whats wrong with red,...

Even the weather page is in a state of moral decay. Whats wrong with red,...

I can't prove it, but I can say it.

I can't prove it, but I can say it.

Shamelessness is a wonderful part of the character.

Shamelessness is a wonderful part of the character.

I don't trust books. They're all fact and no heart.

I don't trust books. They're all fact and no heart.

Here's how it works: the president makes decisions. He's the decider. The press secretary announces...

Here's how it works: the president makes decisions. He's the decider. The press secretary announces...

Decisions! And a general, a commander in chief who has not got the quality of...

Decisions! And a general, a commander in chief who has not got the quality of...

Indecision has often given an advantage to the other fellow because he did his thinking...

Indecision has often given an advantage to the other fellow because he did his thinking...

The press is the best instrument for enlightening the mind of man, and improving him...

The press is the best instrument for enlightening the mind of man, and improving him...