Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you.

Quote by Joan Rivers

Topics: Dieting Quotes

Dont talk to me about Valentines Day. At my age an affair of the heart...

Dont talk to me about Valentines Day. At my age an affair of the heart...

I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.

Elizabeth Taylor has more chins than the Chinese telephone directory.

Yeah, I read history. But it doesn't make you nice. Hitler read history, too.

Yeah, I read history. But it doesn't make you nice. Hitler read history, too.

I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without...

I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without...

You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to...

You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to...

I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were...

I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were...

It's so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up who.

It's so long since I've had sex I've forgotten who ties up who.

I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without...

I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without...

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.

I don't excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put...

I don't excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put...

People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if...

People say that money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if...

I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He...

I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He...

Never floss with a stranger.

Never floss with a stranger.

If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.

If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.

A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or...

A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or...

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call...

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call...

To be rich in admiration and free from envy, to rejoice greatly in the good...

To be rich in admiration and free from envy, to rejoice greatly in the good...

One of life's gifts is that each of us, no matter how tired and downtrodden,...

One of life's gifts is that each of us, no matter how tired and downtrodden,...

If in doubt, worry or despair connect with the God light within you, the only...

If in doubt, worry or despair connect with the God light within you, the only...

To get up each morning with the resolve to be happy... is to set our...

To get up each morning with the resolve to be happy... is to set our...