By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.

Quote by George Burns

Topics: Age Quotes, Funny Quotes

I can't afford to die; I'd lose too much money.

I can't afford to die; I'd lose too much money.

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I...

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I...

You've got to be honest; if you can fake that, you've got it made.

You've got to be honest; if you can fake that, you've got it made.

Be quick to learn and wise to know.

Be quick to learn and wise to know.

The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you've got...

The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you've got...

Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life.

Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life.

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only...

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only...

Actually, it only takes one drink to get me loaded. Trouble is, I can't remember...

Actually, it only takes one drink to get me loaded. Trouble is, I can't remember...

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die...

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die...

It's good to be here. At 98, it's good to be anywhere.

It's good to be here. At 98, it's good to be anywhere.

How beautifully leaves grow old. How full of light and color are their last days.

How beautifully leaves grow old. How full of light and color are their last days.

Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.

Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.

I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a...

I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a...

When I was young I was called a rugged individualist. When I was in my...

When I was young I was called a rugged individualist. When I was in my...

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

Though the Jazz Age continued it became less and less an affair of youth. The...

Though the Jazz Age continued it became less and less an affair of youth. The...

Childhood, with all its mirth, Youth, Manhood, Age that draws us to the ground, And...

Childhood, with all its mirth, Youth, Manhood, Age that draws us to the ground, And...

When your ex asks if you can still be friends right after a break up,...

When your ex asks if you can still be friends right after a break up,...