A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.

Quote by Ogden Nash

Topics: Love Quotes

There are people who are very resourceful, at being remorseful, and who apparently feel that...

There are people who are very resourceful, at being remorseful, and who apparently feel that...

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless...

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless...

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.

There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is...

There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is...

I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.

I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.

People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven't what...

People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven't what...

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a...

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a...

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you...

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you...

Your hair may be brushed, but your mind's untidy. You've had about seven hours of...

Your hair may be brushed, but your mind's untidy. You've had about seven hours of...

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

Middle age ends and senescence begins, The day your descendants outnumber your friends.

Middle age ends and senescence begins, The day your descendants outnumber your friends.

The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we...

The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we...

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to...

I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to...

Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.

Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.

The only people who should really sin are the people who can sin and grin.

The only people who should really sin are the people who can sin and grin.

Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.

Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.