I consider myself to be a pretty good judge of people... that's why I don't like any of them.

Quote by Roseanne Barr

Topics: Roseanne Barr Quotes

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take...

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take...

I know how to do anythingI'm a mom

I know how to do anythingI'm a mom

The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.

The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

I figure that if the children are alive when I get home, I've done my...

I figure that if the children are alive when I get home, I've done my...

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

I was completely nuts for most of my life.

I was completely nuts for most of my life.

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a...

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a...

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take...

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take...

As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband...

As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband...

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a...

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a...

My daughter made me a Jerry Springer-watching kit, with crackers, Cheez Whiz, polyester stretch pants...

My daughter made me a Jerry Springer-watching kit, with crackers, Cheez Whiz, polyester stretch pants...

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be...

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be...

A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of...

A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of...

I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

I hate every human being on earth. I feel that everyone is beneath me, and...

I hate every human being on earth. I feel that everyone is beneath me, and...

My husband and I didn't sign a pre-nuptial agreement. We signed a mutual suicide pact.

My husband and I didn't sign a pre-nuptial agreement. We signed a mutual suicide pact.

We English are good at forgiving our enemies; it releases us from the obligation of...

We English are good at forgiving our enemies; it releases us from the obligation of...

A man doesn't know what hapiness is until he's married. By then it's too late.

A man doesn't know what hapiness is until he's married. By then it's too late.

When your mother asks, 'Do you want a piece of advice?' it is a mere...

When your mother asks, 'Do you want a piece of advice?' it is a mere...

Every man who is high up loves to think that he has done it all...

Every man who is high up loves to think that he has done it all...