Women love a self-confident bald man.

Quote by Larry David

Topics: Larry David Quotes

I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.

I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.

Hear the birds? Sometimes I like to pretend that I'm deaf and I try to...

Hear the birds? Sometimes I like to pretend that I'm deaf and I try to...

It has to do - I think - with growing up in an apartment, with...

It has to do - I think - with growing up in an apartment, with...

I don't think anyone really is interested in reading about my emotional state. It's not...

I don't think anyone really is interested in reading about my emotional state. It's not...

I guess I still feel that I'm a comedian; if I had to pick one...

I guess I still feel that I'm a comedian; if I had to pick one...

I just wanted laughs - that's really what I was after.

I just wanted laughs - that's really what I was after.

I couldn't be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the...

I couldn't be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the...

I've led this empty life for over forty years and now I can pass that...

I've led this empty life for over forty years and now I can pass that...

Actually I walk around with the Emmy wherever I go, but I'm very casual about...

Actually I walk around with the Emmy wherever I go, but I'm very casual about...

There's a sense of spontaneity, and no emphasis on jokes in this show. People generally...

There's a sense of spontaneity, and no emphasis on jokes in this show. People generally...

I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become...

I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become...

I just feed off the energy of the audience.

I just feed off the energy of the audience.

There are times when I'm driving home after a day's shooting, thinking to myself, That...

There are times when I'm driving home after a day's shooting, thinking to myself, That...

And eventually as I kept writing it, something emerged that was not quite me but...

And eventually as I kept writing it, something emerged that was not quite me but...

When I was living in New York and didn't have a penny to my name,...

When I was living in New York and didn't have a penny to my name,...

It's that I wasn't suited to do the kind of comedy that these people were...

It's that I wasn't suited to do the kind of comedy that these people were...

I'll have a vanilla... one of those vanilla bullshit things. You know, whatever you want,...

I'll have a vanilla... one of those vanilla bullshit things. You know, whatever you want,...

Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days.

Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days.

Switzerland is a place where they don't like to fight, so they get people to...

Switzerland is a place where they don't like to fight, so they get people to...

I'm really only happy when I'm on stage. I just feed off the energy of...

I'm really only happy when I'm on stage. I just feed off the energy of...