You may not be able to read a doctor's handwriting and prescription, but you'll notice his bills are neatly typewritten.

Quote by Earl Wilson

Topics: Earl Wilson Quotes

This would be a much better world if more married couples were as deeply in...

This would be a much better world if more married couples were as deeply in...

Gossip, n.: Hearing something you like about someone you don't.

Gossip, n.: Hearing something you like about someone you don't.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

He was so honest you could play craps with him over the phone.

He was so honest you could play craps with him over the phone.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

Today's accent may be on youth, but the stress is still on the parents.

Today's accent may be on youth, but the stress is still on the parents.

He's an honest man - you could shoot craps with him over the telephone.

He's an honest man - you could shoot craps with him over the telephone.

Ever notice that the whisper of temptation can be heard farther than the loudest call...

Ever notice that the whisper of temptation can be heard farther than the loudest call...

Announcement from the proud parents of a baby daughter. We have skirted the issue.

Announcement from the proud parents of a baby daughter. We have skirted the issue.

Nothing is as embarrassing as watching your boss do something you assured him couldn't be...

Nothing is as embarrassing as watching your boss do something you assured him couldn't be...

To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain; tell a man it's deductible.

To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain; tell a man it's deductible.

A woman may race to get a man a gift but it always ends in...

A woman may race to get a man a gift but it always ends in...

Experience is what enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

Experience is what enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Poise: the ability to be ill at ease inconspicuously.

Poise: the ability to be ill at ease inconspicuously.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Always remember, money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it...

Always remember, money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it...

Home, nowadays, is a place where part of the family waits till the rest of...

Home, nowadays, is a place where part of the family waits till the rest of...

If you wouldn't write it and sign it, don't say it.

If you wouldn't write it and sign it, don't say it.