Yeah, I read history. But it doesn't make you nice. Hitler read history, too.

Quote by Joan Rivers

Topics: History Quotes

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call...

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is God's gift, that's why we call...

He who limps is still walking.

He who limps is still walking.

I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without...

I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without...

My routines come out of total unhappiness. My audiences are my group therapy.

My routines come out of total unhappiness. My audiences are my group therapy.

Boy George is all England needs - another queen who can't dress.

Boy George is all England needs - another queen who can't dress.

I don't excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put...

I don't excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put...

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.

Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you.

Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you.

The ideal beauty is a fugitive which is never found.

The ideal beauty is a fugitive which is never found.

I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was 'the...

I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was 'the...

Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer.

Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer.

I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He...

I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He...

I don't excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put...

I don't excercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put...

Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your...

Don't follow any advice, no matter how good, until you feel as deeply in your...

Don't tell your kids you had an easy birth or they won't respect you. For...

Don't tell your kids you had an easy birth or they won't respect you. For...

Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are...

Thank God we're living in a country where the sky's the limit, the stores are...

You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to...

You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to...

I was a woman in a man's world. I was a Democrat in a Republican...

I was a woman in a man's world. I was a Democrat in a Republican...

Flirting is a womans trade, one must keep in practice.

Flirting is a womans trade, one must keep in practice.