Why get married and make one man miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?

Quote by Carrie Snow

Topics: Funny Quotes, Marriage Quotes

No day is so bad it can't be fixed with a nap.

No day is so bad it can't be fixed with a nap.

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car

Sex is the best high. It's better than any drug. I want to die making...

Sex is the best high. It's better than any drug. I want to die making...

The awful daring of a moment's surrender which an age of prudence can never retract.

The awful daring of a moment's surrender which an age of prudence can never retract.

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

If I'm on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants...

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.

People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.

People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.

I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name.

I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name.

The parents age must be remembered, both for joy and anxiety.

The parents age must be remembered, both for joy and anxiety.

The difference between golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie.

The difference between golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie.

A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.

A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.

Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following...

Bush said today he is being stalked. He said wherever he goes, people are following...

I'm a controversial figure: my friends either dislike me or hate me.

I'm a controversial figure: my friends either dislike me or hate me.

If you don't believe in ghosts, you've never been to a family reunion.

If you don't believe in ghosts, you've never been to a family reunion.

You get fifteen Democrats in a room, and you get twenty opinions

You get fifteen Democrats in a room, and you get twenty opinions

The fact that poetry is not of the slightest economic or political importance, that is...

The fact that poetry is not of the slightest economic or political importance, that is...

God heals and the doctor takes the fee.

God heals and the doctor takes the fee.

Why pay a dollar for a bookmark? Why not use the dollar for a bookmark?

Why pay a dollar for a bookmark? Why not use the dollar for a bookmark?

We all have ability. The difference is how we use it.

We all have ability. The difference is how we use it.

When, at the age of seven, he blew up the family truck by dropping a...

When, at the age of seven, he blew up the family truck by dropping a...