We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but we cannot figure out how it travels inside wires.

Quote by Dave Barry

Topics: Dave Barry Quotes

What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.

What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death.

The difference between men and women is that, if given the choice between saving the...

The difference between men and women is that, if given the choice between saving the...

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you...

You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you...

I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize,...

I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize,...

Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is...

Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is...

Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and...

Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and...

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of...

Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of...

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads,...

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads,...

There is a breed of fashion models who weigh no more than an abridged dictionary.

There is a breed of fashion models who weigh no more than an abridged dictionary.

The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of...

The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of...

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count...

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count...

Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always been...

Another possible source of guidance for teenagers is television, but television's message has always been...

We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain...

We operate under a jury system in this country, and as much as we complain...

Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per...

Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per...

If there really is a God who created the entire universe with all of its...

If there really is a God who created the entire universe with all of its...

God hangs the greatest weights upon the smallest wires

God hangs the greatest weights upon the smallest wires

They are always saying God loves us. If that's love I'd rather have a bit...

They are always saying God loves us. If that's love I'd rather have a bit...