Never fight an inanimate object.

Quote by P J O'Rourke

Topics: Funny Quotes

The government is huge, stupid, greedy and makes nosy, officious and dangerous intrusions into the...

The government is huge, stupid, greedy and makes nosy, officious and dangerous intrusions into the...

Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.

Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does...

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does...

Never fight an inanimate object.

Never fight an inanimate object.

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death...

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death...

Children from the age of five to ten should watch more television. Television depicts adults...

Children from the age of five to ten should watch more television. Television depicts adults...

I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about television...

I suppose I should get a VCR, but the only thing I like about television...

Every government is a parliament of whores. The trouble is, in a democracy, the whores...

Every government is a parliament of whores. The trouble is, in a democracy, the whores...

Never wear anything that panics the cat.

Never wear anything that panics the cat.

Newsmen believe that news is a tacitly acknowledged fourth branch of the federal system. This...

Newsmen believe that news is a tacitly acknowledged fourth branch of the federal system. This...

Government proposes, bureaucracy disposes. And the bureaucracy must dispose of government proposals by dumping them...

Government proposes, bureaucracy disposes. And the bureaucracy must dispose of government proposals by dumping them...

Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.

Earnestness is stupidity sent to college.

There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.

There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.

No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for...

No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for...

Never wear anything that panics the cat.

Never wear anything that panics the cat.

When a couple decide to divorce, they should inform both sets of parents before having...

When a couple decide to divorce, they should inform both sets of parents before having...

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does...

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does...

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death...

Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death...

Men are convinced of your arguments, your sincerity, and the seriousness of your efforts only...

Men are convinced of your arguments, your sincerity, and the seriousness of your efforts only...

Death is nothing, but to live defeated and inglorious is to die daily.

Death is nothing, but to live defeated and inglorious is to die daily.