Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake. That's called Houdini. Love is liking someone a lot.

Quote by Jack Handey

Topics: Love Quotes

Whenever someone asks me to define love, I usually think for a minute, then I...

Whenever someone asks me to define love, I usually think for a minute, then I...

When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all...

When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all...

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking...

It's probably not a good idea to be chewing on a toothpick if you're talking...

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it

I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it

A funny thing is if you're out hiking and your friend gets bit by a...

A funny thing is if you're out hiking and your friend gets bit by a...

Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake....

Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake....

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the...

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the...

I wish I would have a real tragic love affair and get so bummed out...

I wish I would have a real tragic love affair and get so bummed out...

Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first...

Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first...

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh...

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh...

If your friend is already dead, and being eaten by vultures, I think it's okay...

If your friend is already dead, and being eaten by vultures, I think it's okay...

If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I...

If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I...

If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadores came...

If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadores came...

If you work on a lobster boat, sneaking up behind someone and pinching him is...

If you work on a lobster boat, sneaking up behind someone and pinching him is...

If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then...

If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then...

If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then...

If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then...

What is a date really, but a job interview that lasts all night? The only...

What is a date really, but a job interview that lasts all night? The only...

What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds.

What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30 pounds.

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of...

Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with...

Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with...