I've got all the money I'll ever need; if I die by four O'clock.

Quote by Henry Youngman

Topics: Money Quotes

So I said, 'Where do you want to go for your anniversary?' She said: 'I...

So I said, 'Where do you want to go for your anniversary?' She said: 'I...

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up they have no holidays.

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up they have no holidays.

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds...

I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds...

I've got all the money I'll ever need; if I die by four O'clock

I've got all the money I'll ever need; if I die by four O'clock

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no...

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to...

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to...

Those bellhops in Miami are tip-happy. I ordered a deck of playing cards and the...

Those bellhops in Miami are tip-happy. I ordered a deck of playing cards and the...

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my...

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, 'There's water in the...

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, 'There's water in the...

A man loved by a beautiful woman will always get out of trouble

A man loved by a beautiful woman will always get out of trouble

Give me one friend, just one, who meets The needs of all my varying moods.

Give me one friend, just one, who meets The needs of all my varying moods.

I don't want to live. I want to love first, and live incidentally.

I don't want to live. I want to love first, and live incidentally.