I've got all the money I'll ever need; if I die by four O'clock.

Quote by Henry Youngman

Topics: Money Quotes

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to...

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to...

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

I've got all the money I'll ever need; if I die by four O'clock

I've got all the money I'll ever need; if I die by four O'clock

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

So I said, 'Where do you want to go for your anniversary?' She said: 'I...

So I said, 'Where do you want to go for your anniversary?' She said: 'I...

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, 'There's water in the...

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, 'There's water in the...

What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.

What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.

I had a nightmare last night. I dreamed Dolly Parton was my mother and I...

I had a nightmare last night. I dreamed Dolly Parton was my mother and I...

Those bellhops in Miami are tip-happy. I ordered a deck of playing cards and the...

Those bellhops in Miami are tip-happy. I ordered a deck of playing cards and the...

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my...

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my...

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up they have no holidays.

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up they have no holidays.

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds...

I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds...

The post office has a great charm at one point of our lives. When you...

The post office has a great charm at one point of our lives. When you...

First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull your zipper...

First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull your zipper...

Win hearts, and you have hands and purses.

Win hearts, and you have hands and purses.

Love will ask you to step out of your comfort zone, to sacrifice and to...

Love will ask you to step out of your comfort zone, to sacrifice and to...