I've got all the money I'll ever need; if I die by four O'clock.

Quote by Henry Youngman

Topics: Money Quotes

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

I've got all the money I'll ever need; if I die by four O'clock

I've got all the money I'll ever need; if I die by four O'clock

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no...

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds...

I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll...

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

Those bellhops in Miami are tip-happy. I ordered a deck of playing cards and the...

Those bellhops in Miami are tip-happy. I ordered a deck of playing cards and the...

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, 'There's water in the...

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, 'There's water in the...

So I said, 'Where do you want to go for your anniversary?' She said: 'I...

So I said, 'Where do you want to go for your anniversary?' She said: 'I...

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to...

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to...

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my...

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my...

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up they have no holidays.

I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up they have no holidays.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

As we grow older, our bodies get shorter and our anecdotes longer.

As we grow older, our bodies get shorter and our anecdotes longer.

Humans are not proud of their ancestors, and rarely invite them round to dinner.

Humans are not proud of their ancestors, and rarely invite them round to dinner.

You've heard of the three ages of man - youth, age, and you are looking...

You've heard of the three ages of man - youth, age, and you are looking...

Many women remain unmarried only because they were too smart to ever marry a man...

Many women remain unmarried only because they were too smart to ever marry a man...