Iraq now says that it will, after all, destroy its missiles. President Bush said, 'Please, I used to pull the same trick. There'd be an intervention, I'd make a big show of pouring out the liquor and then there was…

Quote by Bill Maher

Topics: Bill Maher Quotes

My wife always has a splitting archetype whenever I want to have sex.

My wife always has a splitting archetype whenever I want to have sex.

Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make...

Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make...

Janet Jackson's 'wardrobe malfunction' cost CBS Five hundred and Fifty grand this week. Boy, what...

Janet Jackson's 'wardrobe malfunction' cost CBS Five hundred and Fifty grand this week. Boy, what...

I think religion is bad and drugs are good.

I think religion is bad and drugs are good.

A group of Cuban Americans denounced the Castro government as a fascist regime that monitors...

A group of Cuban Americans denounced the Castro government as a fascist regime that monitors...

The Clinton White House today said they would start to give national security and intelligence...

The Clinton White House today said they would start to give national security and intelligence...

The jury could get the case as early as next week, but the defense says...

The jury could get the case as early as next week, but the defense says...

Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make...

Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make...

When you want to make it clear to the rest of the world that you...

When you want to make it clear to the rest of the world that you...

Whenever the people are for gay marriage or medical marijuana or assisted suicide, suddenly the...

Whenever the people are for gay marriage or medical marijuana or assisted suicide, suddenly the...

If you were on a sinking ship and yelled, Women and children first! how much...

If you were on a sinking ship and yelled, Women and children first! how much...

We are a nation that is unenlightened because of religion. I do believe that. I...

We are a nation that is unenlightened because of religion. I do believe that. I...

I do think the patriotic thing to do is to critique my country. How else...

I do think the patriotic thing to do is to critique my country. How else...

Maybe every other American movie shouldn't be based on a comic book. Other countries will...

Maybe every other American movie shouldn't be based on a comic book. Other countries will...

Abstinence is a perversion.

Abstinence is a perversion.

We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities.

We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities.

Today is 'Take our Daughters to Work Day.' This is when girls ages Nine to...

Today is 'Take our Daughters to Work Day.' This is when girls ages Nine to...

I don't want my president to be a TV star. You don't have to be...

I don't want my president to be a TV star. You don't have to be...

It's all been satirized for your protection.

It's all been satirized for your protection.

I never thought I'd say this, what Obama needs in his personality is a little...

I never thought I'd say this, what Obama needs in his personality is a little...