I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.

Quote by George Burns

Topics: Age Quotes

You've got to be honest; if you can fake that, you've got it made.

You've got to be honest; if you can fake that, you've got it made.

Sex at age ninety is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

Sex at age ninety is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life.

Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life.

By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember...

By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember...

I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased...

I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased...

Its hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when...

Its hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when...

How can I die? I'm booked.

How can I die? I'm booked.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember...

I can't afford to die; I'd lose too much money.

I can't afford to die; I'd lose too much money.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than...

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than...

I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running...

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running...

The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you've got...

The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you've got...

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die...

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die...

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what...

You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what...

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper...

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper...

I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of...

I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of...

It's good to be here. At 98, it's good to be anywhere.

It's good to be here. At 98, it's good to be anywhere.

You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.

You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.