I'm a citizen of the world. I like it that way. The world's a wonderful. I just think that some people are pretty badly represented. But when you speak to the people themselves they're delightful. They all want so little.

Quote by Billy Connolly

Topics: Billy Connolly Quotes

If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?

If Jesus was a Jew, how come he has a Mexican first name?

The human race has been set up. Someone, somewhere, is playing a practical joke on...

The human race has been set up. Someone, somewhere, is playing a practical joke on...

I have been made redundant before and it is a terrible blow; redundant is a...

I have been made redundant before and it is a terrible blow; redundant is a...

I don't know why I should have to learn Algebra... I'm never likely to go...

I don't know why I should have to learn Algebra... I'm never likely to go...

I love Los Angeles. It reinvents itself every two days.

I love Los Angeles. It reinvents itself every two days.

I'm famous for my bottom dances, but you'll only see my bum and willy if...

I'm famous for my bottom dances, but you'll only see my bum and willy if...

I don't believe in angels, no. But I do have a wee parking angel. It's...

I don't believe in angels, no. But I do have a wee parking angel. It's...

Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint.

Ally MacLeod thinks that tactics are a new kind of mint.

I used to have Mad Cow's disease, but I'm alright Nooooooooow.

I used to have Mad Cow's disease, but I'm alright Nooooooooow.

Fame is being asked to sign your autograph on the back of a cigarette packet.

Fame is being asked to sign your autograph on the back of a cigarette packet.

Oh aye...my Father would thrash me every now and then. He'd talk while he did...

Oh aye...my Father would thrash me every now and then. He'd talk while he did...

There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter.

There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter.

Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares?...

Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares?...

To keep the fire burning brightly there's one easy rule: Keep the two logs together,...

To keep the fire burning brightly there's one easy rule: Keep the two logs together,...

Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cosey... Doesn't try it...

Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cosey... Doesn't try it...

I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities. I am not nearly as afraid of...

I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities. I am not nearly as afraid of...

I always look skint. When I buy a Big Issue, people take it out of...

I always look skint. When I buy a Big Issue, people take it out of...

Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.

Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.

Marriage is honorable in all

Marriage is honorable in all

Never get married in the morning - you never know who you might meet that...

Never get married in the morning - you never know who you might meet that...