If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.

Quote by Jeff Foxworthy

Topics: Jeff Foxworthy Quotes

I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of...

I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of...

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?

Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt?

If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you...

If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you...

When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in...

When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in...

You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you're not 'professional' any...

You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you're not 'professional' any...

The more excited the rooster gets, the higher his voice goes. He's got a little...

The more excited the rooster gets, the higher his voice goes. He's got a little...

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year...

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year...

I call our bathroom 'The Vault' because the door's always locked and whatever goes on...

I call our bathroom 'The Vault' because the door's always locked and whatever goes on...

What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do.

What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do.

If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in...

If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in...

I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it,...

I refuse to this day to do e-mail because everybody I know that does it,...

The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any...

The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any...

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You may be a redneck if... your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming...

Watching a baby being born is a little like watching a wet St. Bernard coming...

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to...

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to...

I know God is real. I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

I know God is real. I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a...

If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a...

Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money,...

Find something in life that you love doing. If you make a lot of money,...

Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're...

Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're...